May 2nd 2023 Well things are going well, I have loving friends and significant others, but I still feel like s- I'm always tired and drained, I'm really sick too, my eyes hurt from crying so much I feel so weak, I also relapsed so my arms and legs are sore (if yk yk) I don't sleep not because I do not want to but because I can't my stress won't let me I've been throwing up and unable to eat, if im not talking my my friends online the only other two things I do is watch vent tiktoks and take hot showers that burn my skin,I find myself repeating the same actions every day unable to break the loop, I also relapsed on drinking again, I have a bottle hidden under my bed it's already almost gone, I need a new one, I want to get a hold of a n i c but none of my friends are willing to get me one, I might just steal one, I have people surroundign me but yet I feel so alone, I feel traped in my own skin, things are just getting worse and worse.
