tw: self de@th mentions "what the hell, how could this have happened." orion said his voice quivering but still loud " this isn't real, it can't, she wouldn't." orion bit his lip as he thought through the last days they had with lillian. was there really nothing he could have done? "it's all my fault, isn't it, we made her come with us to the movies. she probably thought she was already gonna.." orion trailed off, not wanting to finish the sentence out loud. he looked around his room, something to take his mind off lillian for a moment. he saw a small crumple of brown fabric under his desk. "what the hell, i don't remember throwing anything down there..?" he said reaching under his desk to retrieve the fabric. he looked at what he was holding and almost cried, it was lillian's bear, the one her mother had made for lillian before her birth. "what..." orion his voice a whisper. why in the world would lillian's favorite thing be left here..they've never had any sleepovers, because of her dad. suddenly it came to him. "lillian had already had this all planned out.." he with an sharp edge. suddenly he felt anger, he knew he definetly shouldn't be mad at lillian, after all he didn't think that he could've made it this far already. but he still felt betrayed by her, how long had this been planned out? days, weeks, months, years?? he felt like he had suddenly lost control of a relationship thats now in the past. as his thoughts raced through his mind he felt lillian's bear tear a bit, he looked down. "oh my god no." orion said his heartbeat quickening. in his anger he had tore lillian's favorite thing. "why did i do that..why..why..why." orion's voice quivering even more. he felt the tears in his eyes, he quickly wiped them away. he needed to fix this for lillian even if she did what she did.. - orion
thx for reading and sorry for the longest upload times imaginable.
