I'm tired. scared. angry. upset. disappointed. annoyed. overall unhappy. my life hasn't been the greatest. but to that I say, what can I do about it? its harder to bite my tongue to stop myself from saying something smart. my mental health is at its last sliver of hope that I can get myself out of this horror I call life but I cant keep that hope alive. I hate venting to you guys since I do it so often and I feel like a attention seeker. that's what my dad calls me and it hurts. he was commenting on my hair and skin and it wasn't good for my confidence because I was out with my aunt and uncle<s. my moms bro and my aunts hus.> its not okay for him to comment on it and I got mad and I was about to leave the whole festival and walk the streets until someone I knew found me. but I went to my grandma instead before I told my dad off (saying he's a dead beat, y'know, the usual dad stuff) my aunt told my mom that they think he's toxic and he is. it gets me so mad that he acts like a dumbo when people are around. commenting on my skin and my brothers skin. both our hair. the way we act. I act very boyish or manly sometimes and my dad keeps saying "yOUrE a GiRL. sTOp AcTiNg liKe tHAt" your a father. act like one. its tiring and I'm getting upset and I'm scared to let it show cause if I do, they'll make fun of me like last time. I was stressed from finals last year and I started crying cause my mom was basically calling me stupid. my mom was saying I was probably depressed but my brother and dad said "shes not depressed, shes just acting for attention." that's not okay in any shape or form and I wish that my parents divorce already. its stupid that they are still together
schools fine. no bullies. YET hahah tanks for reading my dumb ranting. love you <3333
