It... hurt. Like a needle to the chest. Stabbing them, digging deeper. { "No colors anymore, I want them to turn black" } Worse then Zionwhirl thought it would, surrounding him in blackness. { "Maybe then, I'll fade away, and not have to face the facts" } She was dead. Emi, their mentor, who had been /so proud,/ beaming at her and Az. { "I could not foresee this thing, happening to you" } And she wanted to cry, to sob out their heart. To scream at the unfairness of it all. { "I wanna see the sun, blotted out from the sky" } But Zionwhirl couldn't do that. Because if he did, someone would come and try to comfort him, to fill the gap left in their heart. { "I see a red door, and I want it painted black" } And then /they/ would die. A random cat. Because everything was against the she-tom. StarClan or something else. { "I see my red door, I must have it painted black" } And she was /done./ With StarClan, with belief in Afterlives, and definitely done with whatever evil force had decided that he must suffer. Because, it didn't matter who it was. Roxy, Ephemeraleminence... It didn't matter. All left, all died. And Zionwhirl didn't want to cry.