Hi. So I have a boyfriend and recently found out he has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). I suspect that I am his favorite person (FP) and I don't know what I should do. I was doing some research about BPD and everything about being someone's FP seems to match. I would like some assistance figuring out how to help him and maintain a healthy relationship. So from my research I found this out: -the FP should be supportive but also make sure the partner can learn to regulate their own emotions -the partner with BPD is very reliant and almost obsessive over their FP. -people with BPD have a fear of abandonment I am scared to try and help my bf or change how I'm reacting to him needing my assistance regulating emotions and validating him. I don't want to lose him or ruin our relationship. He has had some horrible relationships in the past and those may have also been because his previous partners didn't know how to deal with his BPD. I'll admit I don't know how to (yet) but I want to learn and help him. I don't want to make him not trust me but it seems that that could happen if I try and help him. FACTS ABOUT THE RELATIONSHIP(and us both): -both mentally not ok in many ways -not the best families(his is worse) -we aren't able to date in person so it will be hard sometimes but we've made it work. -travmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa -rp as a good distraction facts abt my bf: (for privacy reasons his name will be changed to... Alex) -a grade above me -also trans male facts abt me: d8ed once b4 him. h8s making others upset
sources and extra: most of my research: https://www.choosingtherapy.com/bpd-favorite-person/#:~:text=Ahmed%20encourages%2C%20%E2%80%9CThe%20best%20way,needs%20of%20someone%20with%20BPD.