i dont want to forget the past, the past where all my worries were, ''can i get to my items before they despawn?'' as i am slowly growing out of stuff i once enjoyed, i wonder, ''will i ever find something i genuinely enjoy again?'' as my mind rushes for answers, i constantly find, ''no.'' i have found that answer alarming, i dont want to forget. i dont want to be forgotten, the more i look for answers to problems, the more i waste time not making an actual impact on at least the community i am in, i dont want to die lonely. i lose this thought for days, then it returns in a loud boom, i want this feeling to end, i want to return to the good days, before part of me yearned for something new, my mind collects dust, as i look through the same memories, as they slowly fade away, into mere relics of the past, waiting for the sweet release of forgetting, but the more i look at them, the more those memories become part of me as a person, the memories i lose, are parts of who i am, without them, im just a blank slate, a person with dreams, who grew out of them, with fears that slowly ate at his soul until it crumpled apart. the less i cling onto my memories the more i lose them, i cant lose them, i need my memories. i dont want to forget them.
