god i do not know how to communicate i wish i was funny and not boring and ppl liked me. i do not want to exist. "are u ok?" let me think...let me think abt how much i try to make others feel validated yet i was never valid in the first place, let me think abt how much i thought people hated me because i'm so boring, let me think about how i cant even FEEL emotions, let me think about how much i hate the fact that i cant even connect with others which makes me feel isolated and hopeless as heck, let me think about how much i want to shut everyone out, so yeah, im okay i dont think i can do this anymore. i am so tired of being sad and depressed everyday and i have to brush it off, life is fun, but i want to just stop existing for now as a break like not even be a thing anymore, disintegrated, so im nothing, that could be nice.
no one wants me. no one likes me. im boring. i suck. i want to disappear. i would crumble away. i act good for others, i have no feelings because others dont let me have feelings, i have to smile, im just a decoration for people to talk to. i try to praise people but my niceness keeps getting taken advantage of. i yearn for ideals just for everyone else. i burned my feelings to the ground. i've put my emotions, feelings, and mental state six feet under the ground can i sleep and never wake up, waking up is torture i wish ppl wouldnt ignore everyitme i talk
