This vent is messier than my hair and life ☠️ So this might sound really strange lol. But um. I really don’t know where to start omg. Last year around this time. New years actually. I was playing a game with my siblings and I accidentally kicked my brother in the face (he elbowed me in my thigh…) so anyways my dad was really upset. Bc I chipped my brothers tooth. My dad screamed at me telling me he never wanted to see my face again so I went downstairs and had supper in the basement (yay me). My sister told me that quote “u really do look like a wild animal” so obvi my dad was talking abt me. Plus I heard him saying things like “she’s like a wild dog, u have to stay away from her”. Long story short, I cried myself to sleep eheh What bothers me most is that I keep thinking abt it (probably bc he never said sorry for calling me that and didn’t let me play with my siblings for a month afterward) and I still think abt it. Although I really shouldn’t. Bc it’s been a year. And my dad is the cause of most of my problems like my weight and self esteem issues. Idk I think he might be a bit too harsh on us. Cuz I’m not sure but he apparently made my brother eat his own vomit. Which is sick. And I can’t talk abt it with my friend bc she already doesn’t like my dad. And he’s more violent with my brother than us bc he told me to delete a video our camera got once of him pinching (probably also hitting but whatever) my brother… So I hope u enjoyed my daily depressiveness cuz I know I didn’t (I missed watching my friend score a goal grrrrr) Yeah. So Ehhe
(This was added later) Also like my dad is the best dad ever when hes not mad. Like we joke around and we talk and everything’s fine. These instances only happen when hes like really stressed. And yeah sometimes he’ll get really mad and violent (mostly towards me or my brother) but yeah. I wish I could say that he has never hurt me physically but that’s lying. So im not gonna do that… But I mean im fine. I swear. I mean hes right abt me being lazy and spoilt anyway. Like have u met me? Ofc im lazy. I can’t bring myself to do anything without being shouted at to lol. And this is really messy and now im just rambling on lmao. I just really don’t like this two faced-ness. And I can’t talk abt it with any of my friends bc then they’ll have an even worst opinion of him (or worse get all lawyer mode on me lol) so im telling u guys (putting it on the internet what an awesome game plan eheh). And my mom doesnt like how my dad treats us but she doesnt do anything. Although she could. Hes never violent towards her. Like I’ve only heard them fight once or twice. Oh yeah and don’t get me started on the cult- And he has like once or twice almost walked out on us. Once bc of ✨me✨ Bc I wouldn’t go to sleep lmao. He just has anger issues ig… he lashes out when hes really angry (like ✨mehehe✨). So yeah. This is a wonderful ending. (And yes weak attempts at humour is my coping mechanism :/)
