006//Roses are Red, Violets are Violas, You're Crazy

Instructions

Roses are rocks, Violets are violas, You’re crazy! A WCE Once upon a none generic fantasy idea, there was a perfectly sane human. Scratch that. First of all… There was no human. Second of all… Sane is not a valid description. Let’s try this again. Once upon a fairy tail, there was a shapeshifter who was in disprite need of holp. I think the spelling needs some fixing. One more time. Once upon a fairy’s tail, there was a none generic fantasy idea involving crazy shapeshifters who jump off of buildings in New York City. That’s it folks, this is a very short story about a crazy shapeshifter who jumps of a building because #&@&!&@(*(!$*^ (aka YOU HAVE TO READ THE STORY). The wind was getting all my hair in my face. The department of magic needs something done so who do they ask? The crazy, shapeshifting, thief! That would be me… I’m not crazy by magic standards, but by human standards. Human standards include that roses are flowers, not magic stones, or rocks (that’s another story that's in Notes and Credits). They all say violets are not violas. Clearly they need to visit Orina to see the famous viola playing tap dancing fugitive. They also always say “You’re crazy!” New York City is huge, bigger than I’d like but I should be fine. This is just a quick rose robbery. By rose, I mean a magical stone that some thieves stole a few weeks back from the magic department. Wearing a bright and colorful t-shirt and jeans, I looked down from the tallest building I could find. I needed to jump from the tallest building to activate a portal to get down into their base. Before you call me crazy, this wasn’t my idea, it was my manager, Violet (who is NOT a viola, she might be a violin though). She’s a pretty good tracker and so I almost trust her completely. A pizza box slammed my face. I screamed a string of curse words in a magical language that involved guinea pigs and hippos. I got ready to shapeshift into the craziest creature possible if I needed to or a pigeon. Dragons would attract way too much attention. Pigeon it is I guess. “5, 4, 3, 2, 1, fall down!” I screamed as I started to fall. Some humans noticed someone falling in a bright colored t-shirt and started screaming. I went from flailing to a perfect dive. “10 seconds to impact, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, SPLAT!” I screamed as I disappeared through the floor. The secret base was a lot more technology based than it should be. Turning into a fairy, I fluttered around until I found a locked vault. “The password is somewhere in my pockets,” I muttered as I changed back into a human. As I unfolded the piece of paper, multiple words were there. “This is a trap. Don’t panic, these are outlaws we need to catch. Press the button and we’ll dispatch. Keep ‘em busy for 10 minutes tops.” I crumpled it up, ripped it up, and stomped on it before turning my hand into a hammer. Best way to keep ‘em busy for me is to beat their vault up with a hammer hand, so that’s what I did (after pressing the button which was on the wall, rather convenient). I started to giggle uncontrollably as I smashed the vault until 4 people came and approached me, weapons in hand. “What are you doing?” One of them yelled. I responded by giggling, 8 more minutes. They drew their weapons. “Violence is unhealthy! Your doctor sent me. They said you were skipping vitamins and I should destroy your fridge to ensure that you stop eating junk of course!” I said. Best excuse I’ve ever come up with right there. “Haha, so funny. We haven’t seen a doctor since we left the smiley realm,” another said. 10 minutes later… “That was 12 minutes!” I screamed at the magical officers who came. “You realize that’s only 2 minutes more, Daisy,” one said with a sigh. They are never here on time. While you were dozing on my epic story, I turned into a duck, another duck, and a goose and gave them &@^*! They are never going to set 10 feet within either ever again. (Let’s pretend I “evil laughed”). “Any more jobs to do? I’d like to jump off the building and turn into a dragon to cause fear throughout the mortal world.” I tell them. “Go ahead, but go to Universal or Disney, it would boost their incomes and the magical society there is on a short budget.” The tallest tells me. I dash out on the steps I didn’t know existed and hopped and the first airplane to go boost some economies and jump off some more buildings. I think I should add a conclusion statement. Here it is, “Roses are magical stones (or rocks), violets are violas, and I’m not insane (don’t you dare say ‘You’re crazy’).” If you would like to hear about the things that are another story (roses + violas) or the sequel, which may or may not be even more insane, just ask me.