Nathaniel: Just be yourself. Maeve: 'Be myself'? Nathaniel, I have one day to win Noah over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me? North: Couple weeks. Beatrix: Six months. Elias: Jury’s still out. Maeve: See, Nathaniel? Maeve: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that? - Beatrix: Rules are made to be broken. North: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken. Nathaniel: Uh, piñatas. Maeve: Glow sticks. Noah: Karate boards. Elias: Spaghetti when you have a small pot. Beatrix: Rules. North: - Elias: Well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear goals and good hearts! Oh, let me guess: you’re out to save the world! North: Well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment. Nathaniel: More or less, I guess... Noah: That sounds awesome! Let’s do that! Beatrix: I’m new here, but I am open to the concept. Maeve: I thought that’s what we were doing, guys, come on! - Maeve: *Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat* North: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents Maeve: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you Elias: Actually I did the math, North would have $225, not $0.15. North: Fam I’m right here.... Noah: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :) Maeve: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please? Noah: Sorry I only have a dollar Maeve: :( Elias: Hey I just realized my friend is right, North would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent Noah: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice Elias: You can buy anything you want with $22,500 Beatrix: Yeah and they wants soda and apply juice Elias: Apply juice to what Nathaniel: Directly to the forehead North: Great chat everyone - 'Can I copy the homework?' Noah: I can help you with it! Beatrix: Yeah, sure. Elias: Bold of you to assume I did the homework. North: lol nope. Nathaniel: Wait, we had homework?!?!?! Maeve: *Read 5:55pm* - Nathaniel: We need to distract these guys Maeve: Leave it to me Maeve: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss. North, Elias, and Beatrix: *Immediately begin arguing* Noah, watching in horror: Oh this. I don’t like this. I don't like this at all. - Nathaniel, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here. Noah: Hey. Beatrix: Hi. Maeve: Hello. North: Hey! Nathaniel: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only! Elias: We were out of Doritos. - North: You wanna see how hardcore I am? North: *punches wall* North: North: Take me to the hospital. - Maeve: Died and came back as a cowboy, I call that reintarnation. - Beatrix: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste Elias: We got spring water Beatrix: NO. Maeve: with EXTRA minerals Elias: it's like licking a stalagmite Beatrix: DON'T COME HOME. Maeve: Mmmmm cave water - Elias: Nathaniel... Nathaniel: Oh no, 'Nathaniel' in b-flat. Nathaniel: You're disappointed. - Noah, trying to ask Maeve out: Would you like to stay for dinner? Beatrix: WOULD YOU LIKE TO STAY FOREVER? - Beatrix: While I’m gone, Elias, you’re in charge. Elias: Yes!!! Beatrix, whispering: North, you’re secretly in charge. North: Obviously. - Beatrix: Please, I'm begging you go to a doctor. Elias: I'm sorry is this OUR st wound? Stay out of it. - Maeve: Is st someone immoral? Beatrix: Not if they consent to it. Elias: Depends who you’re st. North: YES?!? - Elias: Guys, what color would you say Nathaniel's armor is? Beatrix: Gray? Noah: Yeah, gray. North: Like a dark gray, yeah Elias, to Nathaniel: Now, tell them what color you said. Nathaniel: ... Dark white. - North: Ok, maybe playing ‘whose family is most dysfunctional’ wasn’t the best idea we’ve had. Elias's been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can’t get them out... - Maeve: Favorite horror movie? Elias: It Beatrix: Saw Noah: Annabelle Nathaniel: High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics - North: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do? Noah: Have everyone stand. Nathaniel: Bring three more chairs! Maeve: The most important ones can sit down. Elias: K/ll three. - Elias: Anyone d- Beatrix: Depressed? North: Drained? Maeve: Dumb? Nathaniel: Disliked? Elias: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people... - Beatrix: Fitness tip: never stop pushing yourself. Some say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Why not keep going? Why not 9? Why not 10? Strive for greatness. Nathaniel: Next time you’re working out do 15 push ups instead of 10. Run 3 miles instead of 2. Eat a whole cake instead of just a slice. Bvrn your ex’s house down. You can do it. I believe in you. Elias: There were so many mixed messages in that I can’t-
Noah: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth? Elias: You’re a hazard to society Beatrix: And a coward. DO TWENTY. - Elias: I am not out of control! I'm a law abiding citizen! Beatrix: Really? Name one law Elias: Don't k/ll people? Beatrix: That's on me. I set the bar too low. - Beatrix: You k/ll people for money?! Maeve: I can explain! Beatrix: And all this time I’ve been doing it for free like a chump! - Elias, to Beatrix: My life is in the hands of an idiot! Beatrix, motioning to themself and Maeve: No no no no no, TWO idiots! - Noah: Hey, you want some leftovers? Maeve: What's that? Noah: You've never had leftovers??? Maeve: No, because I'm not a quitter. - North, pointing: May I sit there? Beatrix: That's my lap North: That doesn't answer my question, Beatrix. - Beatrix: Hey, Elias? Can I get some dating advice? Elias: Just because I’m with Nathaniel doesn’t mean I know how I did it. Elias, Maeve, & North - Meee Nathaniel, Noah, & Beatrix - @ZariaWentEmo