i've waited so many years to say this and i can't hold it in anymore. Going to cut to the chase and say it now. i hate my art and i hate myself. why do I feel nostalgia for art that i never loved. my past art was so amazing to others yet i absolutely despise them. i wonder why i moved on from success to make myself happy when my art isn't even received anymore I often ask myself if I make art to please others or myself. This past year has been really rough for me and I'm holding on to drawing as much as I can because its all that's left for me. But I feel more and more doubt everyday when I am the only one who feels connections to my work. I feel like all my furry and anthro works were popular not for the reason that they were good but simply I was following the trend of what is liked. I never liked them. Blatantly speaking, I hated those pieces. Every last one. I never drew them for myself, I drew them for others. I'm sorry I had to say this but I truly despise my past. I was driven by motivation to please everyone but myself. I found many asking me why my Lapis Lazuli cast was suddenly changed. That's cause I finally decided I was going to draw because I love art, rather than wanting to wear a mask of popularity. I don't care for opinions on my art preferences; To me if I'm happy, that is enough. Art is a hobby until it isn't and for now I'll be drawing what I want. what that means is, if your design is with me and it isn't human, sorry to hurt you but its going to be human. If you're not comfortable with that then take them back. I have no use for them. I'm not out here making a speech on hate for furries or anthros. In fact I'm friends with many of them, or I used to be, and they're all quite sweet and kind. I don't hate them and that's not why I'm saying this, so don't get mad please. I'm just saying that...I feel so done with art and it really makes me sad that some people do draw for their audience and don't know the joy of creation anymore. I'm sorry for disappointing all of you, if you're here. I really did try, but I wasn't happy. I hope that this makes sense.
