At school I don't want to be known as the person who draws N>sfw because it's it's not a part of my life anymore and I've tried to erase every part of N>sfw that I can and even though I'm trying to be better about it my friends still hold me accountable for it and honestly it's taking a toll on my mental health and honestly I just feel like my friends don't really care about me all that much and it's it's ruining me, it hurts, I don't really want to draw that stuff anymore I've tried to tell them I don't draw that stuff anymore and I've changed but they don't really believe me... so I'm making this because honestly I just want to stop being known for doing that and the fact that they still bring it up it's it's painful because when I did draw N>sfw it was I wasn't very mentally stable and I was going through some stuff but I'm a lot better now and I've been working on it and I think I'm a lot better but my friends still insist that I still draw it secretly and they insist that apparently I am disgusting for drawing stuff I don't even draw anymore? which I am not secretly drawing things, I had a bad encounter with a person who drew some things of my friend and honestly just broke me it was painful and my friend I had a crush on them and they said oh I only drew it because I thought you would like it and... It honestly just disgusts me I don't really feel any thing when I look at it anymore it's just painful, and its everywhere and I really hope that I can get rid of it. I really don't like it, I don't like N>sfw thank you
Now I really hope that my account can stay sfw for everyone. Also this part is mainly just for my friends when I draw a character I like, it doesn't mean I draw inappropriate stuff of them it just means I'm trying to express that I enjoy liking this character through an art expression I'm not trying to be inappropriate and I really need you guys to understand that I'm not trying to do anything inappropriate.[ng to use my ability to draw in that way because those images and just drawing them in general they make me feel like CJ and I don't want to be like her I would rather see everyone I ever loved die than be like her. And when you bring up that I used to draw inappropriate stuff it reminds me of when I actually lost you guys last year and it reminded me of how painful it was because you had been a friend for almost 6 years at the time and not being with you as your friend being reminded of that almost everyday I don't think you understand how much that affects me, being reminded every day that I almost lost you permanently. And I can understand where you're coming from about how I used to draw that and so you're used to it and you you're used to me drawing that stuff but I only made this project to say that I don't do that anymore and to just state my point about how I've changed. Also this is for Ben and faithful when I said I've never judged you for liking a fictional character why are you judging me that was not pointed towards you it was mostly pointed towards faithful because when she told me an official Crush sure she was very nervous but I accepted her for it and even though she likes crazy strange scientist I don't know I didn't judge for her judge her for it instead I accepted her on it and I was actually happy for her that she liked this fictional character because you know if I thought that someone would actually relate to me for once but I was wrong and you still continue to pester me about liking fictional characters and for some reason when it's with faithful it's completely normal and you don't say anything about it but and you even accept her but when it's me I don't know what it is but something is different I know I like a short fat skeleton but like does it really matter that you have to bring it up in every conversation and say oh you like a bag of bones you like this fat obese I know I know and I'm tired I've been taking it and I haven't said anything then like okay but now you've been doing this since 5th grade and I can understand fifth grade but I've been being respectful about it this time and you still continue to do it when I say I don't like it and I literally tell you I've never judged you on this why are you doing this to me I don't like it I know it's a stupid fictional character but why do you have to keep pushing me and pushing me about this I'm really done.
